You Too Can Make Your Fortune
Please raise your hand if you have made a million dollars selling Amway, Tupperware or Mary Kay Cosmetics.
Right now, the owners of 23 and Me and Ancestry dot com are raking in billions of dollars.
Customers are sending in big money and a little test tube of spit to find out things themselves that they did not want to know.
The man their mother told them was their father is not.
They share their DNA with ethnic groups whom they were prejudiced against!
Guys find out that dates who accused them of being Neanderthals were right!
Some folks find out that they have a propensity for Alzheimer’s.
Good thing they forget about that information!
I have a marketing scheme, I mean business, that will make you very rich because, unlike DNA results, you will make your customers happy, happy, happy.
I have made my first billion dollars selling Canine Zodiac Fortunes.
You see, I learned that scientists have discovered that people who read their horoscopes experience a sensation of fulfillment and satisfaction akin to euphoria.
Please raise your hand as I call your Zodiac sign!
Capricorn, Aquarious, Pisces, Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius.
Those signs are based on the twelve months of a year.
The signs of the Chinese zodiac are based on a twelve year cycle.
Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Sheep, Monkey, Rooster, Dog, and Pig.
Since horoscopes are very fulfilling experiences, I simply expanded on the two predominant astrology systems to include America’s most popular breeds.
Did you know that sixty percent of American households have dogs?
Labrador retriever
German shepherd
Golden retriever
Beagle
Bulldog
Yorkshire terrier
Boxer
Poodle
Rottweiler
Dachshund
Shih Tzu
Great Dane
People send me $19.95 and I mail them a personalized horoscope certificate expounding on their best attributes of all three Zodiacs.
People feel so good about their horoscopes some even frame them.
No one has ever asked for a refund.
I am working on my second billion!
I say thumbs up to canine astrological readings!
You will too.